It’s funny because it’s true

The boys over at Bunkerville found this gem.  Sweeeeeeeet.

(School) Recess Appointments

The one and only Manhattan Infidel has an exclusive expose on President Obama’s recess appointments.  Read an excerpt here.

Using the authority given to him under the Constitution, President Obama today visited a local elementary school playground to make a series of controversial recess appointments.

“The Republicans say I cannot do this.  But unlike me, the Republicans aren’t Constitutional scholars.  I clearly have the authority to make recess appointments and that is what I’m going to do.”

He then took his jacket off, rolled up his sleeves and called the schoolchildren over to him. 

“I am now appointing all of you circuit court judges.  I wish I didn’t have to do this but the Republicans have blocked all my nominations, making this day necessary.”

The children, mostly 3rd and 4th graders appeared confused.  Many asked what a circuit court was.  One of the children asked President Obama if being a judge will give him the power to “make girls take their clothes off.”

Read the rest over at the link.

Political fundraiser at a 9/11 terror-connected mosque

Guess who’s showing up for a magnificent rubber chicken (shawarma) dinner gala?

Why would these clowns huff Dar al Hijrah’s dong?  Oh right…because they’re politicians who need money.  Even better, they really don’t care about national security.  If they gave a shit about protecting the US from terrorism, they wouldn’t go anywhere near this rat-hole.  Instead, they’ll gleefully dip their wicks in Dar al Hijrah’s trough.  Pathetic.

What have we learned in the first year of the Age of Obambi?  They can’t be trusted with health care, the federal budget, the student loan system, industrial policy, tax rates or taking terrorism seriously.  What exactly are these asshair Donkey-Punchers any good at?

I mean, besides fucking things up far worse than anybody thought possible?

By the way, Stable Hand of My Pet Jawa found the story.  Gracias.

Media-Dorks: Forget about real threats, look over there at that fake rascism

Yes, Eric Cantor got threatened with death, but hey no big deal.  It’s just a conservative Republican after all.

NBC on Monday night squeezed in a few seconds for the arrest of “a Philadelphia man for threatening the life of the number two Republican in the House of Representatives, Eric Cantor of Virginia.”

Yet after the networks led last week with less-immediate threats against Democrats, they weren’t so interested in a real case of a death threat against a Republican as neither CBS nor ABC aired a word about the arrest and NBC’s Brian Williams gave it short-shrift after leading last Wednesday with Democrats as the victims: “It’s getting ugly as anger over health care reform erupts into some over-the-top rhetoric, including threats now against members of Congress.”

The next night, Williams still portrayed opponents as the only ones with miscreants amongst their ranks: “While the White House continues to celebrate its largest-ever legislative victory, opponents of health care reform have reacted to the final vote with anger, a few of them with threats of violence.”

CBS last week started with “threats of violence against Democrats who voted for health care reform” as Nancy Cordes relayed how “Democrats complain Sarah Palin is also using violent words and imagery.” On Monday, the CBS Evening News devoted a full story to fretting over a “loophole” which insurance companies may use to delay providing coverage to kids with pre-existing conditions and Katie Couric spent half a minute on how the New York Yankees are “the best-paid team in all of sports,” with the NBA “the highest-paid league” followed by cricket’s Indian Premier League.

Meanwhile, who is the guy who threatened Eric Cantor?

Federal Election Commission (FEC) filings show that [Norman] Leboon had made two, separate donations to then-Sen. Barack Obama’s (D-Ill.) presidential campaign. The two donations, made in June of 2008, total $505. These are the only federal contributions on record for Leboon.

Frankly, I think Mr. Leboon has been brain-washed by anti-white racism and the knee-jerk liberal press.

Andrew Breitbart’s Liar Trap Has Sprung

And what do you know?  It caught Tawana Brawley’s favorite race-baiter.  It couldn’t have happened to a nicer fella.

Liar and race hustler Al Sharpton told Bill O’Reilly tonight that he’s seen the non-existent tape that reportedly shows Tea Party Protesters calling Black Caucus Members the n-word.
Of course there is no tape.

Sharpton is lying.

Backstory:  Andrew Breitbart put up $10,000 of his own money that he would then donate to the United Negro College Fund if anybody could provide documented proof that a Tea Partier called John Lewis the n-word during last Sunday’s health care deform vote. 

Congratulations, Reverend.  You played right into Breitbart’s hands.  Thanks for participating in this social experiment/public punking.  Now please exit the American partisan fight, you grotesque race-hustling puddle of political slime.

Health Care Deform: What the fuck did Congress actually vote for?

No, really…what. the. fuck. Did these douchey mouthbreathers sign the rest of us into?  This can’t be real, can it?

The solution to this problem, both in Massachusetts and in ObamaCare, was the individual mandate: Force everyone to pay in, bringing balance to the insurance pool and keeping prices down. Of course, that only works if everyone is actually compelled to purchase insurance. And a report by the Joint Committee on Taxation last week seems to indicate that, as written, the individual mandate may not have any teeth. Here’s the relevant passage:

The penalty [for not purchasing insurance] applies to any period the individual does not maintain minimum essential coverage and is determined monthly. The penalty is assessed through the Code and accounted for as an additional amount of Federal tax owed. However, it is not subject to the enforcement provisions of subtitle F of the Code. The use of liens and seizures otherwise authorized for collection of taxes does not apply to the collection of this penalty. Non-compliance with the personal responsibility requirement to have health coverage is not subject to criminal or civil penalties under the Code and interest does not accrue for failure to pay such assessments in a timely manner.

And the footnote on Code F:

IRS authority to assess and collect taxes is generally provided in subtitle F, “Procedure and  Administration” in the Code.  That subtitle establishes the rules governing both how taxpayers are required to report information to the IRS and pay their taxes as well as their rights.  It also establishes the duties and authority of the IRS to enforce the Code, including civil and criminal penalties. 

So there are penalties for not purchasing insurance. But there’s no serious enforcement mechanism allowing the IRS to make sure those penalties get paid?

On second thought, I really don’t need an explanation.

In fact…kindly and respectfully…shut up Peter Suderman. 

Don’t get me wrong.  It’s great that you did some totally killer research on this.  But really, it’s better if we keep this all to ourselves.  If everybody keeps quiet, hopefully the Democrats and the IRS won’t realize their stupid boondoggle is completely and utterly crippled by itself.  Congress-creeps are pretty open about not reading the bill.  They don’t have a clue what are actually in (or not in) any of their legislation .  Maybe it’s best to let sleeping dogs lie.

Jason Mattera Rules

I found this over at BigGovernment.com.   Good stuff, kids.

Jason Mattera is the guy who spoke at C-PAC this year and promptly got labelled a racist by lamestream media dickwads because he talked in a ‘Chris Rock accent’ or some shit.  Turns out Mattera is from Brooklyn so he speaks with a bit of a Sheepshead Bay brogue.  Which naturally means that Jason Mattera is a massive bigot [sarc/].

Anyway, check out the vid.  It’s well worth your time.

Carbon Footprint Calculator Fun

Environmentalists are so far behind the learning curve they’ve been permanently put back into the slow kid’s kindergarten class.  Even though global warming has been proven to be a human-caused hoax, they still insist that carbon dioxide…the gas every animal exhales…is gonna kill the pwecious pwanet Earf.

So of course, in the fading hope that they can scare people into living like naked stone-age goat herders, Earth Hour and the EnviroPanic Douche-Chill Caucus presents the Carbon Footprint Calculator. 

My score?  If everyone lived like me, it would take 4.6 Earths to provide enough resources.

What the fuck?  That’s all I can wastefully use?  Yes I know, it’s a pathetically low score.  I’ll try to do better by consuming more, recycling less and breathing air to the fullest.  See if you can do better and post your carbon footprint in the comments.

I found this over at Small Dead Animals.  Thanks.

Boob Belt reference sighted!

Snarky Basterd, you should be so proud.  Your beautiful Mobama Boob Belt meme is taking flight right before our eyes.  I’m crying tears of joy for you.

In an ironic twist, I spotted your creation at sight called…Snark and BOOBS.

Which means that Michelle Obama will get involved somehow and I really don’t have the stomach for seeing her boob belt traipsing around all over.

Hahahaa.

Even girls have figured out that our First Fashion Victim dresses like a fool.

You’ve performed a public service, Snarky.  Take a bow, homie.

Obama wants the GOP to run on repealing health care deform

Yeah, that’s what he’s saying.  You gotta love the chutzpah of our lightbringer pResident.

Good thing Barry isn’t a sore winner, right?

Wow.

One gets the idea that Barack Obama was probably a real loudmouth shit talker on the basketball court…when he was winning.

Anyway, AllahPundit is worried that the GOP will be stupid and not run on kicking Obama-Care’s ass to the curb.  I don’t think John Cornyn and the rest of the hand wringing boobs in the Republican campaign leadership have a choice.  For the last year, the only lead in the Right’s pencil has been the Tea Party movement.  If the Repubs want to get anywhere in 2010, they have to run on a repeal platform.  

I mean, certainly nobody thinks that elements of the GOP are perfectly content to be a rump party filling out safe seats and foregoing risks that would bring them into a majority.  Right? Right???

Jonah Goldberg and Glen Reynolds rocking out

Via the one and only Sissy Willis, clickie da linkie to see some cool PJTV action with Mr. Instapundit and the Chronicler of Liberal Fascism.  It’s a really interesting conversation about Washington DC conservo-intelligentsia, the tea parties and the conservative movement.  Well worth a few minutes.

One of the interesting things I got out of it is Goldberg’s observation that two components of the Tea Party’s various coalitions-the Libertarians and the Evangelicals-are playing pretty nicely together in the sandbox.  This was not the case in 2008.  There was talk of a ‘liberaltarian’ movement to bring the libertarians into the liberal caucus.  Supposedly, the failure of George Bush to reign in spending and his robust foreign policy was going to push the L/libertarians into the arms of the Democrat party.  On the other side, the Evangelicals were and remain very skeptical of the hands-off nature of libertarians, thus pushing the libertarians further out of the GOP bloc. 

I for one find the idea of liberaltarianism ridiculous.  I mean, sure, evangelicals and libertarians have had a few rough patches here and there.  But if libertarians were furious with George Bush because he spent waaaaay too much dough and expanded the government, how were they supposed to feel when Barack Obama started getting jiggy with the Porkulus and the Health Care Deform bill?  Orgasmic?

As Goldberg said, the fear of Obama’s hard-left radicalism has had a nice effect of re-sealing the bonds between the Christian right and the free-marketeers within the broadly conservative coalition.  Fear has a funny way of sharpening the mind.  From the looks of things, the honing dread of St. Barry’s leftist agenda doesn’t seem to be letting up anytime soon.  That means the libertarians and the evangelicals will be spending more and more time together.

The Fruits of Paranoia

Hey, the media has done a decent job of painting the peaceful protestors of the Tea Party movement as violent racist wild-eyed rage-monkeys.  How can you tell?  The nervous nellies over at the Democratic Underground are wetting their pants over the trumped-up wave of violence against Democrat politicians.  Read on as the sweet nougat-rich hilarity ensues.

 xultar (Ed-the original poster’s screen name)

I’ve decided to buy a gun. Conservatives have lost their fucking minds 

and I’m gong to protect me and mines.

Seriously DU, I was an avid gun hater mainly because I knew I’d really use it.

Well too fucking bad. I dare Sarah Palin to take her reloadin ass into da hood.

This shit is going live people.

Okay, you say, that’s just one dipshit.  She’s probably just another thumbsucker who’s watched too much MSM crapola and has freaked herself out.  But then she doubles down on the fuckin’ weird.

 xultar 

9. Some looney bin white doode chased me down in my car on Friday Night. 

   

HE totally went off.
I get some strange shit on the roads because I drive a high end car.
You don’t know what it is like driving around in north ga while black in a high end vehicle. I’m almost in Forsyth County.

So you can see why I’m concerned.

I called the cops, got his tag, I was wheelin and dealing and I got his ass. I can drive a v8 like no ones business.

But I will say, I was concerned for my life.

First of all, I call shenanigans.  This story is full of more holes than a full capacity brothel.  None of it makes a lick of sense.  It’s like it was pieced together detritus from the various cop shows, action flicks and cannabis-fueled fever dreams that rolled around this whacky broad’s lame excuse for a brain.  At some point, all that psychic bilge had to come gushing out sometime.  Today just happened to be our lucky day.  

Even cooler than the bat-shit craziness are the not-so-subtle hints that she’s rich and fabulous.  “…I drive a high end car.”  Bitch, please.  You drive an old and busted 1997 Honda Civic with a coffee can tack-welded to your muffler if you even own a car.  More like an ’ass-end vehicle’.  Pics of this allegedly bad-ass expensive whip, or it doesn’t exist. 

The response from the yappy Left is funny too.  Dozens of posts and not one call this obviously messed-up chick on her phoney-baloney story.  Nah, they fall for it hook, line and bobber.  Tells you something about the credulity of your average leftist.  No wonder they believe Barry Obammy’s fantasy rhetoric.   

What’s even better than all that are the posters advocating for this nut-bar babe to get a gun.  Xultar the Brain-Damaged shouldn’t be allowed within fifty feet of a plastic fork, much less an actual-factual weapon.  But even still, some people had ammo advice, some recommended specific models and others even pointed her in the direction of-oh and this is really rad-the National Rifle Association.  Yes, folks, none other than the big bad leftard scare tactic, the NRA.  I must say that it was an absolute joy reading committed liberals…a group who normally cream their jeans at the thought of banning firearms for American citizens…get all trigger-happy and gun-geeky over their heaters and the organization that does so much to protect the Second Amendment rights they normally want to piss away. 

Hypocrites.  Hey Democratic Underground numbskulls-now you know how we feel about guns when we sense a threat to our personal safety.  You know that urge to protect yourself, your family, your friends and your property?  Well for you, it’s a rational and defensible position to own a firearm to be able to defend that which you hold dear.  It’s especially cool to defend guns when one of your own concocts a convenient fairy tale to get you guys riled up.  For everybody else, they get no Second Amendment and hence guns because they’re just not politically motivated leftists like you.

Pathetic.

American Idiot-The Musical

Normally, I do everything I can to ignore Green Day.  The last decent album these faux-English snot punkers made was Insomniac, which they put out in 1995.  A band with that kind of track record of incompetence usually flies well under my radar.  But of course, being the dedicated douchedrinkers they are, Green Day just can’t leave me the hell alone.

The last few days I keep seeing commercials for the Broadway musical version of their lamest effort, American Idiot.  I tried to let it slide, but after the 85th viewing of the advert it just kept pummeling me, like a drunk husband beating on his wife for fucking up the laundry.  Check out the trailer to get a taste of my pain.

Seriously, how the hell is this happening?  Put American Idiot on your mp3 player and give it a whirl.  It’s not a great punk rock album.  In fact, for the most part it’s barely even mediocre.  Besides the tune ‘American Idiot’-which admittedly is bad ass-the songs are tedious.  The supposed centerpiece of this alleged punk-opera album, ‘Jesus of Suburbia’, is a mish-mash of barely connected songs all slapped together and given a Pro-Tools sheen.  The song is so poorly arranged it’s astounding that somebody at the record label let the band put it out.  The rest of the songs are cliched-up blasts of fail. 

The only thing that explains it is lingering Bush derangement.  The fact that the knee-jerk lefties in the music biz think this is even sorta relevant is indicative of just how out of touch these jack-asses are.  If you needed any evidence of just how lame the media elites are, look no further.

Rappin’ ’bout Reps and Bills and Spendin’ ya’all

Thanks a bunch to Patterico for finding the link.

How cool are you?

‘Cool’ is many things to many people.  It’s hard to define and even harder to fake.  One thing is perfectly clear though:  To the Left, they are the only cool ones.  After all, they exclaim, they’re the ones who make movies, art, music and television shows.  Without the artistes-who you must remember are uniformly leftists-America would sink into a soulless abyss without any culture to speak of.  We would be the modern equivalent of Sparta, a sterile militaristic backwater if it weren’t for the statists who dominate the artistic community.

To that, Jeff over at Protein Wisdom says:  Nuts.

Those punk rock “liberal memes” we buttoned-up dorks are trying desperately to hold back are the epitome of hepness and popularity — the “glaciating” endpoint of cultural evolution as it pertains to maintaining a permanent hold on (the oxymoronic notion of) mainstream hipster culture. I mean, what teen in his rebellious stage isn’t going to embrace the edgy cries of, “all our shower heads are uniform in pressure!”, or “hell no, we won’t go (to restaurants that cook with table salt)!”. Why, it’s just like following the Dead around the country!

…The statist scolds — offering soulless progressivism repackaged in the language of freedom — will only hold power so long as they can maintain the euphemisms.

And that won’t last. Jon Stewart’s ears are starting to sprout hair. Matt Damon is a punch line.

Amen, homie.

I made some similar points over at Baldi’s place a few days back.  I guess I just want to add a few things.  People in old media are prone to whining about how the internet and social networking and blogs and video games and cable and talk radio have shattered the post-WWII media paradigm of three major networks, a couple important national newspapers and several glossy magazines.  They lament the slow demise of that archaic system because…well…ummmmm…because it was just…better…that’s why.  That and George Clooney made a really stylish movie about media-types in the fifties and everybody smoked and looked awesome and who cares if it didn’t make any money because reporters were made to look like uber-hip gods.

I think our drive-by media pukes hate the new media environment because in the old Cronkite/NYTimes days, a few reliably liberal figures and institutions could shape the narrative as they saw fit.  The Great Society was a wonderful new government commitment to it’s citizens.  The Vietnam War was hopelessly lost after the Tet Offensive.  Richard Nixon was a singularly evil man and no other presidency had done the things he had done.  The story could be shaped-and shaped quite easily-when the old skool media dweebs had a lock on current events.  Pop music, movies and news would by and large reflect a basically lefty viewpoint.  Moreover, the left knew they could rely on the media monopoly to basically back up their ideological play.  Everybody came out a winner…except for the American cultural consumer, who was given 1/4 of one side of a story some hack thought was important.   

Sometime in the 80′s a lot of that tired shit started going out the window.  Now, the ground is shifting under the feet of every movie studio head, music label honcho and newspaper mogul.  They know it.  The worst thing is that many of them simply cannot adapt.  The newspapers and magazines have been slammed by new media, but other producers of popular culture are feeling serious heat too.  For every ‘Avatar’ that does killer business, there’s a half-dozen or more ‘Green Zone’-type flicks that just fall off the earth and die.  You ever wonder why there are so many reality tv shows?  One big reason is that they are remarkably cheap  to produce compared to traditional television fare.  Even the sleazy nasty old music business is taking a punishing hit lately.  Lady Gaga, American Idol and Justin Bieber can’t hide the fact that many record labels are bleeding out.

What does this all mean?  One thing is clear-the old left’s ability to shape and polish and flake off and embellish a story through the use of art and media until the story suits a desired need is going to end relatively soon.  It will be a gradual process; there certainly won’t be an earth-shattering jolt.  But as the shift occurs, the drive-by media hacks will clutch at anything to save themselves and remain relevant.  There will be some ugly and tense moments as they figure out their new place in the world.

From a political perspective, the new environment will be one where many ideologies will have a puncher’s chance at a fair public hearing.  Instead of having Dan Rather bark the news he and his underlings think is important at you, you will have the ability to create media for yourself and for anybody else.  From a cultural standpoint, it means that the question ‘What is cool’ won’t be defined as ‘whatever a few leftists in show-biz think it is’.

There will always be liberals.  There will always be the idea of cool.  What there will not be is the lock the progressives had on how cool was defined.  Truly we live in an age of wonder and awesomely awesome awesomeness.

Utopia: Not just yet

Oh nooeeeeeesssss……will somebody please think about the children???

WASHINGTON (AP) — Hours after President Barack Obama signed historic health care legislation, a potential problem emerged. Administration officials are now scrambling to fix a gap in highly touted benefits for children.

Obama made better coverage for children a centerpiece of his health care remake, but it turns out the letter of the law provided a less-than-complete guarantee that kids with health problems would not be shut out of coverage.

Under the new law, insurance companies still would be able to refuse new coverage to children because of a pre-existing medical problem, said Karen Lightfoot, spokeswoman for the House Energy and Commerce Committee, one of the main congressional panels that wrote the bill Obama signed into law Tuesday.

Good thing we passed that massively expensive politically costly health care reform bill…just to have the Democrats shit their own pants and not address the very thing they used to emotionally ram-rod this bill through.  I mean, the Donks whine incessantly about how government health care is supposed to take care of sick kids.  Now they figure out that their crowning glory is flawed on their own terms. 

What a bunch of incompetent hacky fucks.

I’m with Mark Levin.  I want my paradise immediately.  Everybody who isn’t serviced immediately by this new health care bill should complain to the President.  In fact, here’s his contact information:

Telephone:

Comments: 202-456-1111
Switchboard: 202-456-1414

Fax:

 202-456-2461

Snail-Mail:

The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW
Washington, DC 20500

I say we bombard St. Barry with all of our health care sob stories and how he should be getting us free doctor’s care ASAFP.  After all, he’s the one and only Barack Obama.  He’s been billed as a light-bringer by every bedwetting leftist.  He campaigned on his extraordinary ability to get our friends to love us again and our enemies to stop hating America.  He said he’d stop the planet from heating up and that he’d slow down the rise of the oceans.  Getting everyone free general practitioner visits should be no sweat for President Messiah McJesusDude, right?

Obama begged and pleaded and cajoled and arm-twisted everybody he could to get his health care bill passed into law.  He wanted to be everybody’s savior.  I say we take him at his word.  Hit him with every sad-sack tale of woe you’ve ever had.  Stubbed toes, shin splints, sprained ankles, erectile dysfunction, tummy aches, hemorrhoids…no illness, pain or minor discimfort is too small.  If he and his boondoggle health care plan can’t deliver on his promises, that’s not our fault is it?

Ann Coulter makes the news…again

This time, it’s in Canada.  Wait, make that ‘Kanaduhhhh’.

Right-wing antagonist Ann Coulter cancelled a University of Ottawa address last night after organizers decided it wasn’t safe to speak.

The move followed boisterous demonstrations outside that sponsors of the appearance feared could turn violent.

“There was a risk there could be physical violence,” said Canadian conservative activist Ezra Levant, who was scheduled to introduce Ms. Coulter…

[Ann Coulter]“I’m guessing the scores to get into the University of Ottawa are not very challenging.”

Not bad, University of Ottawa.  You let a bunch of latter-day brownshirts bully a 100 pound white girl into keeping her trap shut up.  Bravo.  What’s next on the curriculum, gallantly wrestling a lollipop from an infant’s grip?

Kathy Shaidle chimes in with some cool pics from the near-riots.  This is my favorite:

Awwwww shit, it’s on like Megatron now.

You know it’s a party when an angry Afro-militant college PC code enforcement drone shows up.  Once that happens, the white-guilt liberal thumbsuckers can get their racial kool-kid pass validated: “Hey, me and my black friends shouted down Ann Coulter last night.  We really showed that intolerant nazi bitch that we wouldn’t put up with her speaking on our campus for a few hours.”   

Thank God the University Left is completely oblivious to irony. 

Robert Stacy McCain has some good linkage too.

Check out the stupid girl in the stupid hijab giving our gal Annie a hard time about her ‘magic carpet’ joke.  First of all, Ms. al-Draher is yet another example of humorless liberalism working overtime to completely miss the point.  Only a tedious dolt would fail to get the fact that Ann Coulter having a laugh at the expense of Muslim terrorists.   

Even better, here’s Ms. al-Draher striking the victim of discrimination pose against Coulter.  Everybody is supposed to feel sorry for the poor Muslim girl because somebody said something sorta mean.  Boo-fucking-hoo.  But then we come to find that Flame-War Fatimah is a member of group that wants Israel off the map.  So it’s super cool for her to be an anti-Semite, but when Ann Coulter takes a few digs at the religion of peace, that’s unacceptable?  Pot, go ahead and introduce yourself to kettle.

Here’s the best take though:

Coulter’s detractors don’t realize the more they try to shut her down, the more people are exposed to her point of view, and that’s what they don’t want. Why are people more afraid of ideas than of giving the government power to stop the flow of ideas?

Let the discussion flourish, and challenge your opponent’s arguments with your arguments. Attacking the person is weak, and banning ideas is cowardly.

Preach on LaShawn Barber.

The Anatomy & Physiology of a Fart

Yes, kids.  Farts.

Often times my farts feel physically hot. What causes that sensation?
The sensation of heat is when the internal sphincter opens a little to sample what’s in the rectum. That is a normal response. If there isn’t a great deal of gas, the body will expel it slower, allowing you to feel the fart’s heat. If there is a lot of gas, the gas comes out too quickly for the body to feel the heat.

Is the temperature of the slow, hot farts actually higher than the quick, cool ones?
The temperature should be the same. Again, it is a product of the amount and speed in which one expels gas.

What’s the reason behind the smell?
The smell has to do with the amount of absorbed products like methane, which is made by fermentation of what we eat, and that’s what causes the bad smell, basically. As a baby, when you’re born, passing through the vagina, you’re infected by the bacteria in your mother’s colon, and that’s the bacteria you’re dealt for your lifetime. Also, everybody is different in how they’ll digest wheat products, milk products, whatever. And if they are not digested properly there will be a lot of methane produced and a lot of acid, and that would tend to cause a stinkier bowl movement.

Oh, but wait…there’s far more disgusting shit over at the link.  Trust me.  You are gonna wanna read the rest.  Or avoid it forever.  One of those two.

Thanks to dri over at Ace’s Top Headlines sidebar thingy for sniffing out this story.

Today’s signing ceremony had a celebrity drop in

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

It’s nice when a A B C D E F G H I J-list celebrity makes an appearance.

Wait, you mean that wasn’t Gary Coleman?  That was just some nattily-dressed child being used as a political prop during the health care deform signing ceremony?

Oh, wow. 

So on top of Obammy and the rest of the Donkey-Punchers patting themselves on the crotch for vaporizing vast chunks of the American economy, they can’t resist the urge to bring a kid onstage as an ornament to their self-love mega fest.

Let the Health Care Deform Lawsuits…COMMENCE!

Congress has spoken.  Now, the states are gonna chip in.

 With lawsuits.

Idaho, Virginia, South Carolina and Florida have already filed. 

Alabama, Pennsylvania, Oklahoma, North Dakota, South Dakota, Washington, Texas, Nebraska and Utah are expected to throw their two cents into the fuck healthcare deform conversation soon.

Hey, here’s a thought…let’s all contact our state Attorneys General and urge them to file suit too.  Sure it might be a delaying tactic, but it might delay Obammy-Care long enough for us to get a repeal effort in place.

Here’s the state AG’s contact info, in no particular order.  These are the phone numbers for the states that have not thus far announced a lawsuit challenge to the socialized medicine folly we’ve just been coerced into joining.

New York: 1-800-771-7755          California:  (916) 322-3360

Ohio:  (800) 282-0515          Montana:  (406) 444-2026

Alaska:  (907) 465-3600          Arkansas:  (800) 482-8982

Colorado:  (303) 866-4500          Connecticut:  (860) 808-5318

Delaware:  (302) 577-8338          District of Columbia:  (202) 724-1305

Georgia:  (404) 656-3300          Hawaii:  (808) 586-1500

Illinois:  (312) 814-3000          Indiana:  (317) 232-6201

Iowa:  (515) 281-5164          Kansas:  (785) 296-2215

Kentucky:  (502) 696-5300          Louisiana:  225-326-6000

Maine:  (207) 626-8800          Maryland:  (410) 576-6300

Massachusetts:  (617) 727-2200          Michigan:  (517) 373-1110

Minnesota:   (651) 296-3353          Mississippi:  (601) 359-3680

Missouri:  (573) 751-3321          Montana:  (406) 444-2026

Nevada:  (775) 684-1100           New Hampshire:  (603) 271-3658\

New Jersey:  (609) 292-8740          New Mexico:  (505) 827-6000

North Carolina:  (919) 716-6400          Oregon:  (503) 378-4732

Puerto Rico:  (787) 721-2900          Rhode Island:  (401) 274-4400         

Tennessee:  (615) 741-5860          Vermont:  (802) 828-3173

West Virginia:  (304) 558-2021          Wisconsin:  (608) 266-1221

Wyoming:  (307) 777-7841           Arizona:  (602) 542-4266

Hey, sometimes the hail mary is the only smart play you have left.  In the end, it might not be such a long shot either.