Paul Ryan, Herman Cain and 2012
Posted by KingShamus on May 17, 2011
The lovely and talented Pundette expresses an opinion many in the right-o-sphere are thinking.
Ryan looks awfully appealing when compared with Romney, the corporatist candidate, heir-apparent to the nomination, fundraiser extraordinaire, and antithesis of a Tea Party candidate.
Maybe Newt Gingrich’s bizarre, self-destructive attack on Ryan’s ideas wasn’t so misplaced after all? Did he instinctively zero in on his strongest rival?
While we’re fantasizing, imagine the smart, articulate Ryan up against Obama in a debate. One would be armed with ad hominem attacks, distortions, and vague slogans, the other with a keen grasp of the nature of the crises we’re facing, from the details to the big picture.
Here’s a secret the MSM doesn’t want to face: If the debate is about the budget, entitlements or fiscal sanity in general, than Ryan would annihilate Barack Obama in a debate. In the two-plus years of the St. Bambi Admenstruation, the President has demonstrated absolutely no ability to articulate a coherent budget that even sorta addresses the fatal debt spiral America is about to plunge itself into during the next decade. He can talk in sonorous tones about certain things. He does alright when the teleprompter is in good working order and his speechwriters are on their game, but that’s about it.
The lamestream media hacks that run the debates would make sure to stack the deck in their Teen Beat man-crush’s favor of course. But even the chicanery of the liberal press can’t get Obama speak fluently about fiscal policy in an off-the-cuff setting. Barry just can’t be bothered to figure that stuff out. Math is hard after all, and those Titleists won’t knock themselves into water hazards all on their lonesome.
So yeah, Paul Ryan would be a nice guy to have around if Obama could be teased into debating him on equal footing. You know who would do even better than Ryan against Barack Obama?
If we have to “go there” with the race issue, I like what Andrew Breitbart said in his Heritage Foundation speech:
Breitbart . . . wants radio host Herman Cain and Freshman Rep. Allen West (R-Fla.) on the 2012 GOP ticket. . . .
“The only way to defeat political correctness and cultural marxism and multiculturalism is to aim straight at its head,” Breitbart said.
The beauty of the Breitbart approach is that liberals see a quote like that and say to themselves, “Give me a break. They wouldn’t actually do that, would they?”
Because it’s too damned simple. It’s like the fullback dive on fourth-and-goal. But the fullback dive is the perfect play, if you have confidence in your team. Forget the razzle-dazzle — just give the ball to the fullback and run it right at ‘em.
There’s no point worrying about the psychological symbolism of a Cain candidacy when you consider the likely alternative. What all the clever GOP pundits like Charles Krauthammer want to do is to re-run the Bob Dole ’96 campaign: Find some bland non-entity, hire a bunch of speechwriters and consultants, and run a boring, predictable campaign that ends in defeat so that, four years later, Republicans nominate somebody named “Bush.”
Here’s an idea: Put Herman Cain in a debate with Barack Obama in the last week of September 2012, pop a bucket of popcorn, then watch the former businessman demolish both liberal economic shibboleths and multi-culti canards while Obama gets pissed off because somebody actually challenged his petulant over-entitled ass.
The next week after that, DVR the ‘Jersey Shore’, crack open another tub of popcorn and tune in as Paul Ryan does his sober accountant analyst act as Joe Biden’s two brain cells attempt to bump into each other in the hopes of forming a sentence.
Lather, rinse, repeat a couple more times until President Lightbringer and his Administration of Pure Fucking Fail is revealed as the stale old pinko joke they really are right on national television for the entire electorate to see.
As RS McCain says, “What, too easy?”
You’re right. It’s not quite difficult enough to beat a sitting president. Let’s make this election waaaaay harder than it has to be.
How’s about a dull technocrat like Mitch Daniels. He’ll be freaking great. He wants a truce on social issues, thus giving Christian conservatives absolutely no reason to get excited and vote in 2012. How does the GOP wins without the religious right showing up to the polls? Oh yeah, that’s it…they don’t.
Well, if you have a hard-on for dull technocrats who have even more politically harmful ideas than Daniels, you’ll love Mitt Romney. He was for ObamaCare in Massachusetts before he was against it in America. That’ll be simple to explain to voters looking for a contrast between Obama and Romney. Wait, did I say ‘simple’? What I meant to say was goddamn near impossible.
Not an arduous enough path? Try nominating the Newt-Man on for size. He’ll only shoot himself in the foot once or twice a week, then run the barrel up his leg while mashing his finger on the trigger just for shits and giggles. If Gingrich is the GOP candidate, Barack Obama’s campaign message will consist entirely of posters, flyers, youtube clips and television ads proclaiming, “Hey, At Least I’m Not That Self-Indulgent Doucherocket”.
I swear to Jeeeebus…the GOP is going to fuck up the free lunch Obama will be serving up to them in 2012. And why? Because they’re scared of taking a risk?
For almost 25 years, the Republicans have done their level best to play it nice and safe. What the hell has it gotten them? Bush the Elder, Bob Dole, Dubya and John McCain are all admirable men. They have served their country in war and peace, shown tough leadership during times of extraordinary peril and are proud patriots. They’re also politicians who were anointed by their party leadership not because they were good candidates, but because it was their turn.
The MSM is dying for the GOP to play to that cheesedick type. That way, they can just run one their tried-n-true “Republicans Are Racist Sexist Homophobe Ghouls” narratives. To pile on to RS McCain’s football metaphor, the defense is dead sure it knows what play the GOP is going to run, so they’re perfectly poised to break it up in the backfield for a twenty yard loss.
The Republicans have to shatter the habits that have made them so lame and beatable. One way to do that is to nominate people that don’t fit the Donkey-Puncher Party’s pre-fit election templates. Paul Ryan’s budget is a way of getting America in the right direction. It acknowledges reality and doesn’t kick the can down the road, but instead tries to deal with the federal debt in an honest way. Herman Cain is not the usual Ivy League peckerwood elitist. He’s been wildly successful in a world far different from the ivory tower theoretical egghead labs that created Barack Obama’s ideology.
The Cain/Ryan team is a winner. Yes, it’s risky. But then again, if the GOP is just going to do what it always does, there’s a huge chance they will fail and deliver Obama another term. That would be fatal to the American republic. The Republicans should not consign the US to certain doom just because it cannot get past its pathetic loser traditions.