Blog de KingShamus

"When an entire nation thirsted to break free from PC…Andrew Breitbart opened a big bar."–Chris Muir

Archive for February, 2013

Marco Rubio: Hip-Hop Connoisseur

Posted by KingShamus on February 27, 2013

The Senator from Florida, dropping some made rap science on TMZ.

When it comes to early/mid 90′s rap, the stuff that came out of the Biggie-Tupac East Coast-West Coast feud can’t hold a candle to the weirdly endearing Wu-Tang Clan and all their various side-projects and solo discs. And Jay-Z hasn’t put out a decent record since the “Big Pimpin’” days. But that’s just me.

Anyhoo, look at how Rubio is working the media. A Republican isn’t supposed to know anything about modern music, much less have an opinion about old skool and contemporary rapppers. Yet here’s Marco Rubio, talking credibly about urban music. Kinda amazing.

I cannot wait for Harry Reid to tell us of his long standing love of Bone Thugs-N-Harmony.

UPDATE:  Sorry my post came out kinda janky before.  I stink at teh intertubez.  I got those links and embeds fixed, so you can almost read my yakety-yak now.

Posted in Domestic Happenings | Tagged: , , , , , , | 8 Comments »

The Ongoing Problem With Karl Rove

Posted by KingShamus on February 26, 2013

The Turd Blossom In His Most Natural Position

Why do I bring him up now?

Because Hugh Hewitt said this the other day on Twitter:

Still waiting for critics of Rove to nominate best GOP strategist…for most it is like hating your starting QB but having no back-up.

Hewitt’s statement got my dander up a bit and then I sorta went on a rant.

Oops.

Allow me me sorta clean up my tweets for human consumption.

First, I have no other GOP strategerist to replace Karl Rove, so I’ll concede Hewitt a well-earned point.  If I absolutely had to pick someone to run the 2016 Republican ticket, I’d hire the person who ran either Scott Walker’s or Bobby Jindal’s campaigns and then hope for the best.  At least those folks have had success in the last four years.

Like every other facet of the GOP panoply, it’s very tough to have confidence in politicos based in Washington DC.  Choosing somebody outside the Beltway might be the only viable option.

But here’s something I’ve been wondering.  How come nobody–not the slick consultants, the overpriced underperforming tech gurus, or the high-powered campaign honchos–could figure out just how stupid and self-defeating Mitt Romney’s pro-life positioning was?

Think about the journey Romney took to become an anti-abortion presidential candidate.  Homeboy was pro-abortion for most of his public life.  He only started making vaguely pro-life noises in 2005.  He then tried to assure the GOP faithful that he was pro-life.

There were several problems with Mitt’s messaging.  Most pro-lifers were very skeptical of Romney’s rather recent and not completely convincing conversion.  That alone probably depressed social conservative turnout and hurt Romney’s chances on Election Day.

However, Mitt being perceived as an insincere opportunist wasn’t his biggest problem.  Romney never used his pro-life position for anything except winning the GOP nomination.  Once he got that, being anti-abortion was more or less forgotten by the campaign and the candidate.

Funny thing is, Obamaton propaganda ministers David Plouffe and Jim Messina didn’t forget. While Romney was trying and failing to make the election about the national debt going supernova and the sputtering American economy, Obama succeeded in making 2012 about Mitt being a misogynistic piece of dogshit.  Naturally, Team Barry used Romney’s pro-life stance as the convenient hook to slam the former Massachusetts governor as a vagina-hating douchecanoe.  Romney never defended being anti-abortion except in the weakest most mewling ways.  Even worse, the GOP standard bearer never employed his pro-life stance as a club to beat up Obama at all.

For God’s sake, Obama voted against the Born Alive Act when he was an Illinois muckety-muck.  He gave (and continues to give) lots of federal tax dollar love to Planned Parenthood, the same organization that was cool with giving abortions to what it thought were underage sex slaves.  There was plenty of anti-life extremism in Obama’s curriculum vitae that could’ve been exploited by the Romney camp.  But they just couldn’t bring themselves to do it.

So why did Mitt Romney even bother going through the motions to become a pro-lifer in the first place?  His position on the abortion issue didn’t energize evangelical Christians and other components of the social conservative movement.  It didn’t expand the party’s base by getting significant chunks of the Latino vote, a constituency I keep hearing is full of natural Republican voters.  Further, Mitt never employed his pro-life stance as a pivot to attack Barack Obama’s shockingly radical anti-life actions.  Once the primaries were over, being pro-life didn’t help Romney in any way.  It can be credibly argued that being a squishy half-assed pro-lifer hurt Romney because it gave Obama an opening to create the War On Women narrative against the GOP standard-bearer.

This should be an iron-clad rule in politics:  If your ideological positions are not helping you, they will be used by your opponent to hurt you.  This is especially true when it comes to abortion, which is far more emotional and polarizing then an issue like energy independence or entitlement reform.  Mitt and his team forgot this law of partisan warfare and it cost them dearly.

I’ll admit that this post is a lot of gussied-up Monday morning quarterbacking.  On the other hand, the Republican Party consultant class gets paid to figure this out before the election and they still don’t know how to play the game.  If you listen to Karl Rove and his ilk, they still think the GOP’s problems are caused by being too right-wing.  They’ve had just as much time as I’ve had to do a post-game analysis of the November debacle.  Their strongest recommendations involve letting Obama get his way on everything, then lather-rinse-repeat until 2016.

To be fair, Karl Rove won two presidential elections in the last decade, so its not like he’s got no game.  The problem is that he doesn’t understand why Mitt Romney got his ass beat two and a half months ago.  Nor does anybody else who runs anything in the Republican Party seem to get it either.  If Turd Blossom is the best the GOP can do, then they deserve to perish because they suck at politics.

RELATED:  I don’t wanna belabor the point, but I’m going to anyway.

Politics–like life itself–is often not about what you say, but how you say it.  If Barack Obama stated, “I’m going to raise your taxes because I think you’re too stupid to know what to do with all your money”, he’d win 10 states, tops.  If the President declared, “I’m going to obliterate the Second Amendment and incrementally take away your guns because I don’t trust you, the great unwashed bitter clingers”, his approval rating would hover just above herpes.  If Two-Pack Attack Barry admitted that ObamaCare was going to feature death panels to determine who gets what kinds of medical treatment, Romney would’ve won the 2012 election with seventy percent of the popular vote.

But of course, Obama doesn’t do that.  The Duffer-in-Chief believes all those things in his heart, but he never says them out loud.  Instead, he always couches his ideology in nicey-nice pablum:  “balanced approach”, “common sense gun laws”, “Obama does care”.  Even better?  As he describes his own campus Marxism as true-blue Americana,  he’s turns the Republicans into the Ku Klux Klan, the Taliban and the Nazis all rolled into one big slimy ball of extremism.

It doesn’t help matters when prominent candidates on the Republican side completely lose the plot and play into his hands.  The problem with the GOP isn’t that Todd Akin misspoke on the life issue.  It’s that Todd Akin was never taught how to speak credibly and effectively about his political views in the first place.

To stick with the abortion issue, being pro-life isn’t enough for a political candidate.  Being extremely pro-life isn’t enough.  Being pro-life and then turning your position into a cudgel to beat up your opponent is what has to happen if you want to win.  Allowing yourself to get bogged down in some weird rhetorical side street will only get you in trouble.  If you’re not on offense, you’re on defense.  That means you’re getting your ass kicked.

This is true of every political issue.  Why take a stand on any topic if it cannot be weaponized and deployed against an opponent?

Posted in Domestic Happenings, Politicians behaving badly | Tagged: , , , , | 3 Comments »

Sorry I’ve Been AWOL

Posted by KingShamus on February 15, 2013

Slacking Off Is Teh Roxxxor

I apologize for the extreme radio silence.  I wish I could say that I won the lottery or was on a tropical island vacation, but the only thing keeping me from blogging is work.  Since nobody has offered me six figures, two weeks vacation and generous health care benefits to crack poop jokes at President Obama’s expense–Hey Richard Mellon Scaife?  Hit me on Twitter, homie–I guess I gotta stick to the grind.

So I guess that means that I’ll be away for a little while longer until I get some things done.  I’ll still be tooling around the Twitterverse from time  to time.  In the meantime, listen to  Boris’ “Farewell” while you read these three great blog posts from people who are not me.

Robert Stacy McCain–Meet @BridgetteDunlap, Fordham’s Campus Commissar of ‘Human Rights’

Charles Hill–With friends like these

John over at The Sentry Journal–America out of scale: Rethinking the Permanent Apportionment Act of 1929

Great work all.

Hopefully, I can get back to actually blogging soon.

Stay sassy, peeps.

Posted in The Social Scene | Tagged: , , | 4 Comments »

Music Monday Super Bowl After Party — “We Are The Champions” (Live) by Queen

Posted by KingShamus on February 4, 2013

Congratulations to the world champion Baltimore Ravens.

 

 

 

And so ends the 2012-2013 National Football League season.

If you’re a Ravens fan, this couldn’t be a more epic victory.  Ray Lewis got to ride off into retirement as a two time Super Bowl winner.  Ed Reed snagged an interception to tie him for most post-season picks by a defensive player.  Joe Flacco capped his insane playoff run with a well-deserved MVP trophy.  John Harbaugh beat his brother to take home the Lombardi trophy.  The team had to fight off both a momentum-killing 34 minute power outage and a second half comeback attempt by the San Francisco 49ers, yet still managed to score a victory.

For a Super Bowl that didn’t seem like it had the big time vibe of past games, the contest itself had many tense moments.  There were stand-out defensive plays, ridiculous athleticism from both offenses and an amazing kickoff return for a touchdown.  Even though the Ravens never trailed, the 49ers taking advantage of the power outage to slowly reel Baltimore back within striking distance was dramatic.

This is a reminder of something we take for granted.  It really doesn’t matter who’s playing in the Super Bowl.  You could have the Kansas City Chiefs playing the Carolina Panthers.  As long as the teams are roughly equal in skill, the games are going to be pretty fun to watch.

Speaking of that power outage, here’s something schadenfreude-y.

Show of hands if you had ‘Green Energy Fail’ on your Super Bowl Bingo card.

Think about this:  The Super Bowl is a multi-billion dollar game.  Fortunes are spent on 30 seconds of ad time.  Businesses fight and claw each other just to be kinda-sorta attached to this event.  Cities lobby to host the game because they know it’s an economic boon.  There’s some serious crony capitalistic shizzle going on with the American professional sport’s premier night.

And yet, even with all that money and prestige on the line, the efficiency experts couldn’t figure out how to get power to a football stadium.

If you think that’s great,  just think how rad it’s going to be when the Obamatons mandate smart meters for your house.

Posted in Domestic Happenings, Music Monday, The Sporting Life | Tagged: , , , , , , | 6 Comments »

Super Bowl 2013–Ravens Versus 49ers

Posted by KingShamus on February 3, 2013

This year’s NFL championship contest is, on paper at least, not all that exciting.  Neither team has been to the Super Bowl in a while.  While both teams have seen some success in recent years, both clubs lack the national followings of franchises like the New England Patriots or the Dallas Cowboys.

Beyond a cursory glance, Super Bowl XXXXLIQ Eleventy Gajillion has it’s share of story lines.  The head coaches for each squad are brothers.  Both teams came painfully close to getting to the Super Bowl last year only to see their seasons’ abruptly end just short of reaching the big game.  All-Universe Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis is playing in his final NFL contest.  San Francisco quarterback Colin Kaepernick is starting in his eleventh NFL match.  Seen that way, it turns out there’s a lot to latch onto for casual fans and die-hard football watchers alike.

Besides the human interest aspects, the two teams play decidedly different styles.  Specifically, their offensive philosophies have little in common with each other.  Joe Flacco, the underrated Baltimore quarterback, is a concrete birdbath when he  drops back into the pocket.  He’s not particularly mobile,  but he’s got a Howitzer where his right arm should be.  Flacco can accurately deliver bombs at any time to anywhere on the field.  More importantly, he comes into this game playing the best football of his life.

Flacco is the field general for an offense that relies on talented wide receivers like Torrey Smith and Anquan Boldin as well as stand-out running back Ray Rice to make big plays both in the air and on the ground.  While the Ravens attack has guys like Dennis Pitta, a tight end that causes match-up problems for defenders, it is still a more or less traditional NFL system.  Watchers of the game will recognize most of the Ravens’ offensive formations and plays.

On the other side of the field, Colin Kaepernick is for all intents and purposes a rookie playing in the biggest sporting event on the planet.  Although he’s inexperienced, he’s got serious weapons like running back Frank Gore, tight end Vernon Davis and wideout Michael Crabtree.  Kaepernick leads a dynamic offense that employs the read-option and the pistol formation.  The pistol makes it very hard for defenses to understand what the offense is about to do.  Because it can be used for running plays or passing  attempts, the defense cannot simply assume a run or pass is coming at them.

The pistol is even more devastating when paired with read-option plays.  The read-option means that on running plays the quarterback can read the defense to determine his next move.  He can elect to hand the ball off to his running back or keep it himself and take it upfield.  Here again, the key is confusing the defense to keep them from pinning back their ears and attacking whoever has the ball.

As great as these systems are for the offense, all the  misdirection borne from them comes at a price.  By using the read-option and the pistol, teams put their quarterback in a position to take punishing hits.  As the quarterback is by far the most important player on the field, this is the ultimate high risk/high reward strategy.

There is no guarantee that Colin Kaepernick will be able to play the same way next year.  Hell, there’s no guarantee that Kaepernick will be capable of performing at a top level next week.  Mobile quarterbacks are not known for their durability.  Just ask Michael Vick or Robert Griffin III how easy it is to stay healthy when regularly being flattened by psychotic 300 pound physical freaks.

Besides the risk of massive career-ending injuries to the team’s key offensive player, the read-option and pistol are not unknowable puzzles.  Defensive coordinators across the league are already studying it.  Eventually, they’ll solve the riddle as they always do with every new offensive scheme that comes out.  It’s one thing to only have seven or eight days to prepare for the pistol/read-option’s trickery.  It’s quite another to have seven or eight months to study formations and plays.

Realistically, San Francisco better win the Super Bowl today.  This season, the 49ers benefited from having an insanely-gifted athlete playing at the top of his game leading a previously-unknown offensive scheme that few teams have been able to stop.  Next year, it’s very possible that none of those advantages will be applicable to the team.

To me, this year’s Super Bowl hinges on this question:  Can the Baltimore Ravens defense, lead by aging veterans like Ed Reed and Ray Lewis, contain Kaepernick and all the gadgets that San Francisco employs?  I have my doubts.  The Ravens pass rush has been spotty during the playoffs.  I’m not sure they can go after Kaepernick with just their down lineman and get to him.  If they can’t at least put him on ground a few times, it’s going to be a very long day for Baltimore.

Ultimately, this means that Joe Flacco and the Ravens offense will have to match Frisco’s offensive output.  That might be very difficult.  While the Niner’s defense has been shaky in recent games, it’s less flawed than Baltimore’s.  I think San Francisco can get to Flacco.  Perhaps not on a regular basis, but enough to knock him off his rhythm.

That leads me to think that San Francisco will win this game.  I see it ending in something like 30-24 or 28-20 in the 49ers’ favor.  Since I’m so good at predictions, this means you should bet on the Ravens.

From an emotional level, I don’t care for either team.  It’s amazing how Ray Lewis is a beloved figure in the NFL even though he mentions his love of Jesus every five seconds, but Tim Tebow’s much less demonstrative proclamations of Christian faith have made him a divisive figure in sports media and in the larger culture.  Also, I don’t know how the pious spiritual leader act fits with Lewis’ deep involvement in an unsolved double murder.

On the other hand, San Francisco head coach Jim Harbaugh is an unrepentant asshole even by NFL head coaching standards.  When he won against  Detroit, he started a fight with Lions coach Jim Schwartz because he’ had to be a trash talking shit-heel.  When he lost to the Giants last year in the NFC championship game, he refused to do a post-game interview and take his licks like a man.  When things are going his way, Jim Harbaugh is a classless sore winner.  When his team is defeated, he’s a classless sore loser.  Basically, Harbaugh is a younger less likable Bill Belichick with fewer accusations of cheating and no championship rings.

If I had to pick a team, I guess I’d root for the Ravens if only because it would be fun to watch Harbaugh, football’s latest overgrown playground doucherocket, take yet another brutal loss.  Is that petty?  Yes.  But it’s the National Football League we’re talking about here.  If we didn’t have silly small-minded peeves to nurse, we wouldn’t have a league in the first place.

You know what else is great about football?  Cheerleaders.  Lots and lots of cheerleaders.  Let’s take a look at a few, shall we?

The Ladies Of The Baltimore Ravens

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The San Francisco 49ers’ cheering squad

 

 

 

 

 

Enjoy.

Posted in The Posts of Morale, The Sporting Life | Tagged: , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments »

 
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 4,333 other followers

%d bloggers like this: