Ya know that thing that Obama said would happen unless we raised the debt ceiling by August 2nd? Well, it still happened.
Credit rating agency Standard & Poor’s on Friday downgraded the United States’ credit rating first time in the history of the ratings.
The credit rating agency said that it is cutting the country’s top AAA rating by one notch to AA-plus. The credit agency said that it is making the move because the deficit reduction plan passed by Congress on Tuesday did not go far enough to stabilize the country’s debt situation.
…S&P said that in addition to the downgrade, it is issuing a negative outlook, meaning that there was a chance it will lower the rating further within the next two years. It said such a downgrade to AA would occur if the agency sees less reductions in spending than Congress and the administration have agreed to make, higher interest rates or new fiscal pressures during this period.
I know this is going to shock some folks out there, but it seems that TurboTax Timmy once again made a boo-boo in his normally trustworthy calculations.
April 19th, 2011-Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner said Tuesday there is “no risk” the U.S. will lose its top credit rating amid a new analysis that revised its outlook on American debt to “negative.”
In another similar risk-free move, I decided to go without the condom. The way I figure it, when will I be in Haiti again?
Speaking of foolproof plans, remember the trillion dollars we absolutely had to spend on the 2009 stimulus package in order to avoid an economic collapse ? It’s a good thing we did that because the jobs report that came out yesterday was, in a word, AWESOME.
U.S. stock futures fell Thursday after a report that the jobs market remains stagnant.
The government said that the number of Americans who applied for unemployment benefits for the first time last week rose to 400,000 from 398,000 the previous week. The increase was slightly less than Wall Street’s estimate of 405,000 claims.
Stocks have been volatile this week because of concerns that the U.S. economy is weakening. Manufacturing, consumer spending and hiring by private companies are each below what typically signifies a healthy, growing economy.
Glass half empty: Unemployment remains sky high.
Glass half full: The ever-growing number of FUNemployment participants means there are more folks to share in the excitement of collecting food stamps, selling off family heirlooms at pawn shops and getting drunk on weeknights without the hassle of going to some buzzkill job the next day.
See? It’s all about accentuating the positives.
Let’s move on to more cheerful international news. The Chinese government, which from now on will be referred to as ‘America’s Co-Signer’, is super-stoked about the US credit downgrade.
In a harshly-worded commentary by the official Xinhua news agency, China gave its first official comments on the United States losing its gilded AAA long-term credit rating.
“China, the largest creditor of the world’s sole superpower, has every right now to demand the United States address its structural debt problems and ensure the safety of China’s dollar assets,” Xinhua said.
China also urged the United States to apply “common sense” to “cure its addiction to debts” by cutting military and social welfare expenditure.
“The US government has to come to terms with the painful fact that the good old days when it could just borrow its way out of messes of its own making are finally gone,” Xinhua wrote.
It’s always a blast when the scumfuck statist asshole ChiComs lecture the US about fiscal responsibility. Next up: The Sudanese give America a stern talking-to about race relations and Dominique Strauss-Kahn wags his finger at the States over the evils of sexual harassment.
This massive debt stuff is just the gift that keeps on giving, isn’t it? Not only is it crippling the economy and putting our grandkids into fiscal slavery, it’s also a national security threat. If China had a rage-boner to do something imperialistic, like fomenting a hot war on the Korean Peninsula or invading Taiwan, could America really do much to stop it?
But hey, it’s not a total loss. A fun time was had by all at Barry O’PartyHearty’s birthday bash.
President Obama and his A-list pals danced barefoot in the East Room on Thursday night, after dining in the dramatically lit Rose Garden to celebrate his milestone 50th birthday. Obama Foodorama was told by guests who attended the “fabulous” but “casual” five-hour barbecue for more than 200 people that the President “let down his hair” and literally danced for hours, finally leaving his own party shortly before midnight.
Stevie Wonder gave a “surprise” performance during the celebration after dining with the President and First Lady Obama, leading the crowd in a soulful rendition of “Happy Birthday.” Wonder’s hit “You and I” was the President and Mrs. Obama’s wedding song. Guests included Jay Z; Tom Hanks and his wife Rita Wilson; Chris Rock; hoops legends Charles Barkley and Grant Hill; Whoopi Goldberg; Dallas Cowboys Hall of Famer Emmitt Smith; Steve Harvey; and actor Hill Harper. He’s one of the President’s closest chums from Harvard law school, and star of CSI: NY. Jazz great Herbie Hancock and his ensemble played four songs; R & B singer Ledisi dazzled the crowd with two selections.
Look, I’m not gonna get on Team Bamster’s case for having a birthday party in the President’s honor. Obama is an undersmart over-entitled brat of a man after all. Not giving our widdle baby POTUS a celebrity-filled celebration would’ve just led to a whiny tear-soaked temper tantrum. The foot-stamping in the West Wing would’ve been monumental. So you’ll get no complaint from me about this fabulous bar-b-que soiree.
No, it’s more annoying to think about the glitteratti that populated Obama’s birthday party.
Look at the cavalcade of clueless morons on display. Back in 2008, these sports and entertainment megastars were the first to tell us just how fucking rad Obama was going to be as
God-King President of The Whole World America. Tom Hanks made a man-crush video thinly disguised as an endorsement. Chris Rock was a big Obama supporter and continues to flack for his BFF, saying the Tea Party are a bunch of small bratty children who are also racists. Whoopi Goldberg uses her perch on The View to spout pro-Bambi talking points at every opportunity.
These celebutard assholes are always on hand to pump up their high-powered buddy and tear down opposition to Obama’s reflexive nanny-state socialism. Meanwhile, as the swells do the Electric Slide at the taxpayer’s expense, the feedback loop of epic failure stemming from Obama’s policies stacks up like cord wood. The disconnect between the fantasy land inhabited by these entertainers and the reality of St. Barry’s repellent ideas could not be more stark.
The famous folks at Barack Obama’s b-day party love to lecture the rest of us about our political choices. They think because they can dribble a basketball or make pretend on camera, they have carte blanche to tell us how to think. Meanwhile, the entertainment community’s track record of picking winners is pathetic.
In 2008, the song and dance troupe and jockstrap aficionado caucus made their feelings heard. These rich-without-merit douchenozzles got to pick our President for us. Look at their decision–a sanctimonious hopelessly corrupt socialist ratbag who has done everything in his power to wreck the economy. Thanks a bunch, celebrity jag-offs.
To be frank: Eat shit, Hollywood. Blow yourselves, pro athletes. In fact, all of you should get fucked in the dookie-hole with a dirty rubber sideways with no lube, you useless sleaze-ridden pack of brainless bootlicking sycophants. You suck at politics. You suck at life too. You worthless hacks who contribute next to nothing in society besides shitty movies, unlistenable music and out-of-wedlock children don’t get to give normal folks constant third degree couch lectures from your insulated mansions.
No. In 2012, just stick to what you’re actually good at–which ain’t much, you dickstains–and let the republic sort out who should lead us. You picked America’s boat-anchor. You chose the Alinskyite Marxoid that has driven us to default and rampant unemployment. Now own your stinking wretched incompetence, sit the hell down and shut the fuck up.